This and any Columbus day it’s so easy to sit at home in a comfy armchair, a cushy office chair, or even on the back porch in an Adirondack chair; looking back at history and throwing out righteous, indignant posts based on what you learned (or didn’t) in your history class, or from the well-spring of bitterness so many must feel as they contemplate their hard-bitten and hardscrabble life from behind their computer screen.

We get it- Columbus didn’t actually ‘Discover’ the Americas. Everyone knows by now that the Vikings had already been here at least 500 years prior, and fewer people understand that the Phoenicians were most likely here much, much earlier than that (like 3,000 years earlier)- and they were mining copper for goodness sake.

Columbus day has become not a holiday, but a bash-a-day, where judgmental fools judge an early explorer by modern-day standards, with little understanding of what the norms of his day were or how diverse and un-standardized things were across cultures that were far more divided from each other than they are now.

Don’t even get me started on the meme’s about Native Americans ‘allowing’ ‘Illegal’ immigration. They had no such policies and laws. They were killing each other, doing their own damage to the environment, and invading other Native American ‘nations’ before the overwhelming influx of white tribes swept across the land. Being from across the sea didn’t make us any different, so cool your jets.

I love how people who couldn’t even sit still for a 5 hour drive in a luxury car, or lead a kindergarten class to a garden of candy have so much to say about what a ‘horrible’ person Columbus was and what a horrible leader he must have been. I’d love to see those people on a wooden Caravel with no modern amenities (toilets!), backbreaking labor, cappy food, and an uncertain future journey into the unknown on a ship full of rough men. It would be even more amusing to watch those same delicate fops of the modern age try to Lead such men.

So sit back, watch your zombie episodes, play your video games, eat your fast food, and shop online. Don’t worry your pretty little brains about trying to take some indignant and dismally righteous stand against something very few people actually know anything about, or have the right frame of reference to understand.

Or go ahead and make your cute little statements. You only show yourselves to be whiny, petty fools to others who know better.


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